Forgiveness Isn't Necessary: Why People You Have Disagreed With Are Golden Launch Pads

Instead of holding grudges against
challenging people we should be giving them
standing ovations for their diagnostic
genius in providing the perfect prescription for
what needs to be cleaned up within us.

While relaxing over the holidays, I was amused at the number of times that a previous acquaintance, co-worker, or friend came to my mind, with whom I had had a challenging encounter.  I support and admire all who truly forgive, but I am more amazed by the Law of Attraction's explanation of this dynamic. Forgiveness assumes the following flawed premise:  Somebody did something to us that was wrong and it assumes we have a grudge.

We are all subject to the laws of the universe, such as gravity. Another law, called Law of Attraction states that whatever we vibrate we manifest into our lives.  Our vibration is determined by what we think about, ponder, subjects of rumination - such as the past, present and future of our lives.  Therefore, whenever challenges enter our lives - people or events - we attracted them through our vibration.  Instead of holding grudges against challenging people, we should be giving them standing ovations for their diagnostic genius in providing the perfect prescription for what needs to be cleaned up.  Whatever ill feeling has occurred, we have just been given a solution equivalent to six months of therapy at ninety dollars an hour.

One process for accessing this solution, lies in the energetic explanation of Law Of Attraction.  When we experience an unpleasant emotion from a current circumstance or past remembrance, we launch a rocket of desire for a new and improved set of life conditions.  Once this rocket is launched, the universe responds and holds the completed, improved situation in vibrational escrow, a kind of a trust fund waiting for our emotional maturation.  Our goal is then to increase our vibration so that we are a vibrational match to this manifested vision.  Once this happens then we get access to the escrow or trust fund. 

Therefore, in the case of challenging human interactions the steps are as follows:

Step One:  Acknowledge The Rocket They Helped You To Launch: 

"Through my life experience with you I have given birth to something different. I am going to leave you where you are to tend to your own reality, while I hold to the new and improved vision that you helped me to conger.”

Step Two:  Acknowledge That Improving Your Vibration Will Heal All:

"Challenging Person, when I get so good at appreciating the rocket you helped me to launch, my challenges with you will become irrelevant and our former troubled relationship will become irrelevant, because I will have become a vibrational match to my dreams and they will be fulfilled."

One possible result of our new vision is that the person involved will change their behavior.  In other words, our improved vibration inspires a new way of being from this person as they interact with us.   The second way that our vision may manifest is through new people entering our lives.  There are a world full of beings out there who are already a vibrational match to what we want.  When we become a vibrational match to what we want, these beings must come to us. 

Step Three:  Increase Vibration:

There are clear easy to use processes, such as the Sedona Method and focus wheels, that help us improve our thoughts and emotions thereby increasing our vibration. Please see my blog dated August 11, 2010:  "Increasing Vibration" for a full explanation.  Also see my webpage which discusses releasing methods:  www.deborahbird.com, then click on "Terms"

The universe is orchestrating circumstances and events to accommodate us on every subject in the world – not just relationships.  If what we want is not coming to us, it’s not because we are deprived.  It is simply that we are a temporary vibrational mismatch to what we are seeking.  This brand new year I give not an olive branch to my challenging people, but a mint leaf, in gratitude for the fresh and lively new start that each and every one of them has inspired within me.  No grudges and no forgiveness necessary.  

The Pledge

This blog will discuss:

1) How using the Sedona Method can provide immediate relief for long held problems. The Sedona Method is a simple, yet profound, technique for removing resistance. Instead of pushing against emotions such as doubt, frustration, failure, The Method coaches participants to welcome, accept, let go of the emotion. 

2) Taking The Pledge:   A process which fully enacts the law of attraction based on the teachings of Abraham.
3)  These processes can be applied to any long held problem in the areas of career, health, money, and relationship.

Yesterday, I decided to apply the Law of Attraction in a conscious minute-by-minute experiment, so I created The Pledge, which established a new life priority.  Some of the results were quite magical and will hopefully be useful to others. 

The Pledge:  Instead of promoting my business, lining up clients, figuring out new health strategies, going to social functions, making new business and social contacts, or racing around town “getting things accomplished”, I now have new life priorities that look like this: 

1) Sorting All Mental and Physical Activities:  Every movement, action and thought will be observed consciously, evaluated and selectively sifted, letting those that  might result in an unpleasant emotion fall through the sieve and be washed away, leaving only the golden nuggets in the sieve, which will create good feelings.
2) Segment Intending, Prepaving and Milking:  I will segment intend and prepave to get into states of appreciation, or I will simply observe what currently is pleasing  in my life, the fall trees, the ability to work from home.  Once I start to lock into appreciation, I will embellish and relish this harvest.

3) Stray Thoughts and Emotions: Any stray, unpleasant emotions, which infiltrate this process, will be immediately released.  I will stop whatever I am doing and thank the problem for showing me where I am stuck vibrationally and then begin releasing.

4) Rationale:  The Law of attraction states that when we have good feeling thoughts we go into a high vibrational state, which allows our natural abundance to manifest. Stated more practically and bluntly,  it cuts the to do list down to one…..our priority is to have good feeling thoughts whatever it takes.  Success is always evaluated by the condition of our lives. Our lives are the perfect reflection of everything that we been vibrating up until this point. 

My hypothyroidism has been crushing me for the past three days.  This problem has arisen, my mind is telling me, as a result of staying in a vacation cabin.    I found out they sprayed insecticides about two weeks ago and I am obsessing on the estrogen mimickers found in all insecticides.  “Here we go again, when will the world realize the dangers in these substances that have led to the current epidemic of hypothyroidism.” I feel myself sliding into anger.   “I need to fix this by moving, by opening windows, by washing all the floors and cabinets.  I am getting the effects of estrogen dominance.”

Ignoring my discomfort, which has been a life long challenge, and focusing on my Pledge instead…”Remember the Pledge, remember nothing else matters, but The Pledge”.  Although the anger has already risen into my head, reflecting the over emotionality associated with this disease. I grasp to refocus, but am unable to do so.  A sumo wrestler is now pressing with all his might down on my shoulders making my fit, trim body feel like the body of a patient in an obesity clinic.   The local pool cleaning company seems to have used their super vacuum to suck  all loving and happy emotion from my heart, leaving only the standard crabby shell of a human now sitting here in this kitchen chair.

With great effort, I force myself to begin the process of releasing resistance. I try the Sedona Method holistic technique, which alternates between welcoming the problem and welcoming the opposite of the problem, or the healed version.  “Can you welcome your incessantly sick body”.  That I can do.  Now for the healed version: “Can you welcome the vibrantly healthy body that you deserve.”  I feel a door slam in my face meaning a big “No”, which is okay because now, in accordance with the Sedona Method, I can push it away as much as I want to, rebel against this image as much as I want to, or welcome how stuck I am with this side of the holistic – all wonderful techniques, none of which are resulting in any movement for me at the moment.

I know that the word “deserve” is my challenge in the way I worded this release.  Anyone who exercises rigorously and regularly, participates in verified methods of cleansing, eats raw foods and vegetarian foods, participates in mental fortification regularly DESERVES to be healthy- whether it is me or anyone else.  

I keep fishing and land on: “Can you welcome the impossibility of having the healthy body that you deserve?” Goodness knows, after everything I have done to get well, it must be impossible.  I can feel in my gut that I have hit the core of the issue. I begin to feel movement, however at the same time, I feel overwhelming discomfort,  I want to stop releasing and go get something to eat.  I have come to understand this feeling of needing to shift, as a sign that I am releasing well.  Also, I remember my Pledge to release and completely release.  This sense of completeness is a distinct feeling like a wave washing over me, which then sends me into oneness.  Therefore, I continue with my odd version of the holistic, going back and forth between the healed me and the impossibility of being healthy.   Finally to my amazement, the right before my eyes the hypothyroidism begins to lift.  The sumo wrestler stops pushing as hard on my shoulders; I have graduated from the obesity clinic, having lost a few hundred pounds; my mind is optimistic, and there is now an almost human form sitting on the kitchen chair. Welcoming the impossibility of a healthy body was key for me in this release.

“I feel the urge to run”. I am dismayed that I can think of running one hour after the onset of my discomfort.   Although running has a strange way of turning on the hypothyroidism, especially in the afternoon, but I decide to do it anyway.  My run turns out to be exhilarating and I soak up the colorful fall scenery.

As I begin my standard yoga exercises that follow my run, I become aware of some chronic thoughts that have infiltrated my Pledge screening process. I am vaguely aware that under several layers of consciousness, I am complaining:  “I exercise so much and my body is still so feeble.  I can’t believe I have exercised my whole life and I still feel diminished much of the time. Often my exercises exacerbate the hypothyroidism in the short term, so I exercise diligently and get kicked in the pants afterwards with super fatigue – some times as long as the rest of the day.”  I am acutely aware that some version of this tape plays every time I exercise – yikes!

I welcome the chronic thought patterns of illness, and then begin doing a focus wheel on my physicality:  “I have had the fortitude and intelligence to exercise my whole life. No matter what, I keep going.  I have exercised every two to three days without fail for years.  I am so lucky to have the mental strength to engage in this healthy activity.  I know my diet has increased my vibration”.  Then I branch off from the official focus wheel process and start appreciating all the fall leaves around me and the amazing fresh air that I live in now.  My yoga is easier today and I feel especially revitalized.

After freshening up, I look in the mirror and I can’t believe who I see looking back.  A radiant, energy filled woman, who looks years younger than this morning.  I am racing with energy and good cheer. By applying The Sedona Method and the law of attraction, I have turned around three days of serious and medium serious hypothyroidism. By no means do I think that this episode represents the end of this health issue, nor do I wish for that.  Having improved my material life significantly and shed many nagging and recurring stresses, I embrace my hypothyroidism for what it brings me.  It is Source Energy knocking on my door saying:  “Hey Deborah, you’ve done a great job of increasing your vibration through all your practices, and we are doing a good job of calling you to the new and improved you, but the old thought patterns and ways of being are creating a big gap between the new you and the old you.  For now we are going to really get your attention and label the gap ‘hypothyroidism’, but you know its just our way of telling you that you have got to get up to speed with the new, higher vibration you.”   In bliss, I now begin to happily milk these good feeling states and surprising sucesses by writing about them, thinking about them, re-living them, and embellishing them.

Deborah is avialable for coaching sessions and trainings at:  deborah@deborahbird.com

Bossess With Fangs or Vibrations With Fangs

This blog will discuss:
1) The unknown causes of conflict with supervisors;
2) The steps for releasing the conflict;
3) How to relieve work stress.


Last week I received an email from a friend who is having challenges at work.  He relayed an email sent to him from his supervisor, which was rudely worded, demanding a set of engineering drawings from him in a short amount of time that everyone long ago agreed were unnecessary.  I took a deep breath and hopefully exhaled one hundred percent of my former work life.  As my friend is a conscientious, thoughtful and spiritual person, I also felt relief that people can be good and still be mistreated by management.  In other words, I was not a bad person because I had a long string of bosses, who could have successfully auditioned for the role of Frankenstein just by being themselves.  By harnessing the law of attraction and following the below steps, I have eliminated this dynamic from my life.

When dealing with work place conflict, the first step is to understand that the goal in all our endeavors is to take the path of least resistance.  The way we gauge our path is by our emotions.  As much as possible, we should feel like we are swimming downstream instead of upstream, or we should feel good; we should feel ease and flow.  When we have that upstream feeling or feel unpleasant, we need to find better feeling thoughts.  The key is to remember it is your emotional journey that matters.  Your emotions determine your personal vibration on a given issue.  When your vibration rises to a higher level, then you float towards your natural abundance.

For example:  Your boss sends you a preposterous email stating several things that aren’t true and starts blaming you for some long held guideline that they originally established, but now have decided they don’t like anymore.

To cross the threshold into the emotional journey where your freedom lies, you must accept that it doesn’t matter who is right and who is wrong.   The truth is irrelevant and your attempts to demonstrate that you are upholding the truth do nothing but dig a grave. Yes, sad but true  .... where is Abe Lincoln when you need him. You must accept that you are not there to show what needs to be fixed and fix it.   Let go of how wrong your boss is because its contaminating your mind; it is an upstream thought. See the following Youtube for a good explanation of this: www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvBhqsa_1zE&feature=related

As someone who has dedicated my life to spiritual pursuit,  it was hard to accept  that honesty, kindness, and charity, did not lead to a good life.  In my old thinking, those who did good in the world built good karma and those who did evil built bad karma, resulting in a good or bad life respectively.   We see the same kind of logic in the Christian traditions with:  “Your reap what you sew.”  Rather than advising people to let go of concepts they may hold dear, I advise that they see them peacefully co-existing with new concepts.   I have found that goodness and virtue are irrelevant in determining what manifests in life.  I am not recommending that they be discarded.  Virtues have significance, just no creative power. 

Moreover, for those who have studied leading edge methods of creation, I have found that visualization, affirmations and prayer take a back seat in creative power to the power of the second by second stream of thoughts washing through us, usually unobserved.  When I began watching, I became aware of a tsunami of negative thoughts:  reruns on past occurrences that were usually belittling in some way, judgments of others, complaints about my current situation.

In order to swim downstream, you must find pleasing thoughts.  In the case of my friend, workplace conflict is a repeating pattern for him, to the point where he has been let go numerous times.  Since the condition of our lives in this moment shows us what our thought patterns have been previous to now, I know that he has been regurgitating the past.  When something hurtful happens to us, we tend to remember it, ponder it, defend it, and try to figure out who is right and who is wrong.  All this does is create more of it. 

The healing of this is threefold: 1)  Welcome the negative thought, or allow it to peacefully exist, side by side with you for a few moments.  For a detailed explanation of welcoming see the "Terms" section of:  www.deborahbird.com,  2)  Then focus on some aspect of your boss that is pleasing, however small:  He is a good writer, his communication is clear, he keeps his office very neat, I like his taste in briefcases.   You can then begin to do a focus wheel.  See for detailed description of how to do a focus wheel, see blog dated 8/4/10 “Burning Up The Gap”.  3) Look at the day from the perspective of a sculptor.  Every day you wake up and you have the opportunity to sculpt a perfect life.  In this case, the clay is your thoughts. Everyday when I wake up I say:  “Today it is my primary intent to focus on things which are pleasing to me.  By appreciating my life and all the beauty in my environment, I am accessing an incredible power that has the ability to sculpt a beautiful future for myself.  I use to participate in sloppy creating by letting my thoughts run wild in remembering, justifying or figuring out the past. Now I see them as incredible creative tools and today I will use them properly.”  Now, according to Abraham-Hicks, you have exchanged the power that creates worlds for the peanut gallery that wasn’t helping you anyway.  By applying these processes, you will reach the place where you have a positive, nurturing work environment.

When conflict arises, it certainly warrants an attempt at discussion and understanding.  If your boss’s lights are on, there will be a meaningful exchange and you will hear one another, and there will be movement.  If their lights are not on, you will get bizarre statements in response to your questions, your boss will blame you, talk over you and not listen.  The situation will be worse than when you started. If the lights are not on, make no further attempts at verbal resolution.  Respond politely and accurately to all requests for information and float above all attempts to ignite you into defense and debate.

 Your boss has just shown you what needs to be cleaned up in your vibration for you to move forward in this life.  You don’t have a Frankenstein boss; you have a Frankenstein vibration surrounding the issue of bosses. Lucky you, you have just clearly identified how to float downstream, where all your abundance awaits you – who wants to stay in the same old stuck place – congratulations!  Freedom is around the corner…… with love to my dear friend Victor!

Gain Number Four: Financial Flexibility

This blog will:

1) Remind everyone that celebrating the gains is equally as important as learning to handle life challenges.

2) Talk about “Gain Number Four”. I am celebrating my gains in order of priority. See previous blogs.

I am celebrating having more flexibility in my financial life.  After a period of being caught in a financial pinch and being under employed, I designed a new career, and finagled free trainings and certifications in the field.  After visualizing for a year on receiving a specific job,  I was offered a position by one of the nation’s largest and financially promising companies.  I opted, for the moment, to remain self employed and keep my options open. It should not be unnoticed by interested readers that this has occurred over the past two years, officially designated as a depression - or close to it.

Primarily, I used the Law of Attraction and the Sedona Method to sculpt this new future for myself.  My blog describes the practical application of these tools in my daily efforts, and I also provide coaching on these subjects.


For coaching assistance:  deborah@deborahbird.com

Celebrating Gains: Gain Number Three

This blog will:
1) Remind everyone that celebrating the gains is equally as important as learning to handle life challenges.
2) Talk about “Gain Number Three”. I am celebrating my gains in order of priority. See previous blogs.
3) Discuss a gain I am experiencing from applying the Sedona Method to release resistance on the subjects of home and community.

Mary by rosebush - She is an expert
gardner

Steve is a talented
potter & ceramicist

Today I celebrate making some progress on my previous releasing efforts, where I addressed the issues of community and home. Releasing resistance is a technique where we allow negative thoughts to wash through us, as opposed to latching onto us and establishing roots. In recent blogs (Aug. 4th and May 24th), I have spent some time releasing on life challenges that have surfaced around the issue of living space. Completely unplanned, I have stumbled into a happy family scene with my friends Mary and Steve.

Some people are just born generous, and Steve and Mary are two of them. I have plopped down in their house, because I need accommodations while I work on a horse project here in Sedona. They have welcomed me on short notice with open arms, assisting me with my cause. Their home is cozy, serene, clean and well organized, providing a nurturing atmosphere for massaging my positive outlook on the world. Our days are full of shared meals, hiking in the sculptured mountains of Sedona and laptop sessions exchanging digital media revelations. Thanks Mary and Steve for this excursion into domestic tranquility and for generally being great friends.

Long Term Problems and How To Make Progress Anyway

This blog will describe:
Feeling stuck and how to get results with releasing anyway.

I expressed a frustration regarding slow progress on an issue to our coaches in a recent support group. “Don’t forget to acknowledge all the successes that you are having. It’s very common to forget to look at the improved mental clarity, the renewed physical vitality, the increased money flow and just grip onto what isn’t working”, they advised. Definitely good advice, but I am acknowledging my gains, which as evidenced in the two previous blogs and my daily activities.

They try again: “What about releasing on wanting to work on this goal?” This advice hits me in the pit of my stomach, right on target. My gut has announced its potency; my emotions verify by flying into irritability and anger. “That’s it, you got it”, I tell them. They are both good at providing the missing nuggets in releasing efforts.

The next morning, I begin releasing on wanting to work on the goal - the goal of getting rid of my father, the incessant hijacker of my abundance by his unappreciated visits to my visualizations. I can feel my frustration over this issue fade. I continue and the process expands into releasing on wanting in general, and again further into releasing on wanting results on my releasing. My stomach opens, my mind opens and the frustration disappears. As I do this, I feel larger and more connected to the world. I have a new found sense of freedom and begin a day full of connections with friends and meeting new friends.

Increasing Vibration: Gain Number Two

This blog will demonstrate:
1) What it is like to celebrate a gain, looking at every nook and cranny.
2) Talk about “Gain Number Two”. I am celebrating my gains in order of priority. See previous blogs.

I am celebrating vibrancy and health, but more importantly I am celebrating the multifaceted importance of my personal vibration and mastering how it creates health. Vibration is the radio frequency that all of us emit. When you look into the face of someone who is radiant and glowing, whose eyes sparkle, this is the person who vibrates at a high level.

Understanding the Four Parts To Vibration:

Part One: Feeling Good Emotionally
The primary driving force, which determines how we are feeling in any given moment, is our emotions. Our emotions are controlled by one thing and one thing only: our thoughts, our point of focus. The greatest miracle of life is that we can only think one thought at a time. What a blessing! Why? Because our minds want to grab onto difficulty, ruminate over it, and re-live it. Much better to reign in one drama rather than to deal with multiple ones. I have learned how to redirect my focus even when I am entangled in my mind’s most engaging “Debi Bird Soap Opera”. I have become the director of my play and can write, script and caste a play of abundance - usually in a matter of minutes. Therefore, I rescripted my difficult thoughts into vitality, joy and enthusiasm.

Part Two: Spiritual Vibration
When our spiritual bodies vibrate at higher and higher levels, our thoughts are buoyed and default more often to pleasant thoughts, thereby supporting and enhancing our emotional being. Any of the variety of spiritual methodologies will suffice…..any religion, any spiritual path, any form of meditation – the form is irrelevant. What is relevant is the time of day during which the practices are undertaken. The first few hours before sunrise, known as the brahma muhurta or the spiritual hour, is known across religions as a potent spiritual time. All nuns, monks, yogis of any path perform their spiritual practices during this time of day. You will double or triple the effect of your practice by making use of this time. Recently, I have participated several times a week in a temple program taking place at this time.

Part Three: Increasing Physical Vitality:
Eating high vibration foods and exercising automatically increases our emotional states. These two activities are the fastest and simplest way to lift our vibrational state and to get into the flow. Faster still is the art of juicing, drinking raw vegetable juices prepared in a juicer. I recently completed an eleven day juice fast, a wonderful up lifter, but not necessary to participate in the joy of juice. For now, you can start by adding three eight ounce juices to your current diet. Because of the extreme nourishment in these juices, your cravings and your desires for low energy foods will simply dissolve. Exercising and diet also work on a physical level to cleanse toxins from the body.

Part Four: Organization and Cleanliness of Physical Environment
Cleanliness and organization empower and energize the body, and streamline thought processes.

By doing any or all of these processes your personal vibration will increase and your thoughts will more often focus on the positive in your environment. When this happens you go with the flow and into the place where your desires manifest instantly – or at least more quickly. The good news comes with a caution. If you do everything I mentioned in this blog, your vibration will increase quickly. What happens frequently in this situation is that our well-entrenched thought patterns may continue grasping the negative. This creates a gap between who you are being now, i.e. Mr. or Ms. Crabby, and who your vibration has become, i.e. floating in a pool of joy. The two beings stretch apart with great intensity and you will feel like you have hit a tree at one hundred miles per hour. See blog: Burning Up In The Gap: August 4th, 2010 to learn how to handle this situation.

Debi is available for coaching at debi@debibird.com

This blog will:
Remind everyone that celebrating the gains is equally as important as learning to handle life challenges.

This morning as soon as my eyes opened, I remember the thick, long multicolored snake obstructing my path as I tried to return to my inn a few years ago while visiting Brazil. The neighbors heard me call out in this rural peasant village and soon there were a handful of people gaping at this eight foot long -snake. “This is an important sign – I just wish I knew what it meant”. I knew by the villagers reaction that this snake was unusual even for the countryside-quasi-jungle of Brazil – after all the snake had plenty of jungle he could squirm around in blocks from where we stood. Coming to the center of the town, stretching out across the road, and lying there placidly while everyone around him was screaming and acting like they were going to slay him with bow and arrow was unusual. I had come to Brazil to visit world reknown faith healer John of God, making the significance of the snake even more important.

As I reminisce over this divine gift, I remember being told that it means transformation, and transformation I have received. In addition to being healed of cancer while I was in Brazil, I also received a nice push to track down Esther Hicks, who I learned about in the movie The Secret. The consistent and accurate application of her body of work provided the transformation I sought. Many people say, “Oh yes I have been familiar with this work for years” and imply that they have adopted it into their lives. Yet by knowing them and also hearing how they have applied it, it is apparent to me that many people mistake Esther and Jerry Hick’s work for another book on positive thinking. Far from it. For example, thinking positive thoughts when you are in anger is detrimental because it only activates frustration, effectively blocking whatever you are programing to receive.

Rather, I would classify their work as first of all learning how to love challenges in our personal lives, because this is truly the fuel, the motivation, for moving us forward. They call these challenges contrast. After this acknowledgement, we clearly identify where we are in range of emotions and implement a series of steps to lift our emotions into higher states. When we are in a state of fluid, effortless appreciation our desires instantly manifest. And lastly, there is a whole psychology of how to “milk it”, as they say, when we are feeling good. When we experience a breakthrough, have fun at a party, get into a higher emotional state, then relish this, turn it over in our minds, play it out as long as possible.

In that vein, over the next several days, I am going to celebrate my gains from having ACCURATELY adopted the law of attraction into my life. I know my audience wants to hear me say: “I made a million dollars, I met my soul mate, I got the perfect job”, but what I have to say is much better than all of that put together.

Number One Gain: I now love contrast. Contrast is highly intense, unpleasant emotion, which seemingly arises from life circumstances that irritate us and sometimes push us to the limit. It is never the circumstances that are the cause of the intense emotion. It is always, always, always because our true self is vibrating at high levels where every dream unfolds into our lap, and our everyday self is not letting us go there. How? By thinking lower level thoughts that don’t match the vibration of our high self. Solution? Jump up and down for joy that you have an emotional guidance system that is letting you know right away and with lots of force that you need to improve your thoughts, gradually and meaningfully. What do we normally do? Try to figure the problem out, blame others, justify the strength of our rightness, push really hard to change the circumstances, get angry, call all of our friends and tell them how ridiculous so and so is who “caused” all these problems – all of this is like pouring kerosene on a fire.

What a relief it is to have the perfect solution to every problem. Isn’t it wonderful that our goal isn’t to change the circumstances? Isn’t it wonderful that we get to change our thoughts, because it is soooo much easier than changing circumstances. I am so grateful that my emotional guidance system lets me know with such accuracy, when I am swimming upstream.

Tune in tomorrow for the Number Two Gain…..

deborah@deborahbird.com

Burning Up In The Gap

This blog will explain:
1) How to handle seemingly unresolvable life situations that erupt and cause tension.
2) Why things always get worse, before they get better.
3) How to stand in the fire and do a focus wheel at the same time.
4) The processes contained within this blog can be applied to money, career, relationship – any aspect of life where there is a concern.


I am whoosie at the thought of moving into my new apartment, which I hastily, and now I see somewhat blindly grabbed. It is a furnished monthly place that includes utilities, cable and wireless - not easy to find, even in a big city. I see now that my highly dependable sense of smell must have been temporarily disengaged during my first visit, as I enter the door and inhale that cheap hotel smell. I just now see that my neighbor has tattoos over every square inch of his tee shirt and shorts laden body. Since he wasn’t there when I surrendered my deposit check, I only now get to see that when he parks his car it is eight inches from my bedroom window. Currently, I am in travel mode, promoting my business and meeting with clients for extended contracts and I have brought too many possessions along. The physical effort of finding a place, relocating my things, cleaning, and now being disenchanted by the new place puts me in the fire. There is no refuge. I can't go forward and I can't go backwards.

The roach in my bed tomorrow morning agrees with my assessment as he cackles, sitting back on his haunches, glibly picking his fangs with a tooth pick, legs casually crossed, reclined on his elbows: “Yee haaa, here we go again Bird ….more chaos”. This eruption in my life only has value in that I get to ask myself: “What would Abraham say, what would Ester & Jerry say.”

They say what they always say and get paid, at their own admission and amusement, millions of dollars to say over and over again to us mortals, who hear it every time as though it is revelatory: “Don’t take action to change the circumstances, take action to change your vibration surrounding the circumstances.” Then we revolt with our regurgitation of what it is: “There is no way I could continue to stay in the yoga center. My feet hit the floor at 4:30 am and I ran until 8 pm. There is constant unspoken pressure to work all the time on the center’s work, even though my original agreement was to have time to work on my own business. Then there was a bit of dogma here……. Blah, blah, blah.” This only causes the roach to cackle even more, he pulls out his tiny scissors and begins clipping his hair: “Success – I have ensnared her in the maze of her mind. She thinks that proving how right she is matters”. The fire turns into a furnace.

Engulfed in flames, I am surprised that I am able to gather my thoughts to the point where I can hear what I know and have already heard: “Despite the fact that you are exploding at the moment, change your vibration around place. Right now your vibration is screaming chaos on this subject and I am delivering what you asked.” Does anyone else ever want to slap Abraham?

I begin the series of steps to welcome the "place chaos" prescribed by the Sedona Method. (See blog entry: Monday, May 24th, 2010: Releasing Does It Take Time To Work for detailed instructions.) I welcome the roaches; I welcome the funny smells now well steeped into the walls of what has turned out to be a shantytown abode. When the only grocery store in your neighborhood is a Food City you know you’re in trouble. I welcome the Food City. I welcome early childhood troubles that have the same aroma as this one.   After releasing some resistance through this process, then I start my focus wheel as prescribed by the Abraham-Hicks techniques.

Step One: Identify what is outside the focus wheel: Living place chaos.

Step Two: Identify what is Inside the focus wheel: Easy, flexible living circumstance.

Step Three: Identify one small thing that is working now on this subject and build up in small steps to the center of the focus wheel: “Yikes! Hmmmm? The roach is especially handsome…no that’s not right.” I try again: “I am lucky to have a troubled childhood because now I have lots of motivation to learn healing techniques…..no not quite, but maybe a little better.” “My last living situation was an improvement over my previous one….that’s it….very true….I got it….I got on the focus wheel”.

Now, I build from this point: “ I have been doing lots of things to increase my vibration. I completed an eleven day juice fast. I have been doing early morning spiritual practices every day and rising early every day. My current dilemma notwithstanding, my energy levels are soaring and my sense of well being is at an all time high. Now that my vibration is higher, my lower level thoughts are creating a bigger gap between where I am vibrating internally and my general, old, worn out mental disposition. This is why things always get worse before they get better. Although this gap is extremely uncomfortable, I am the master of my thoughts and can redirect them. Remember when you feel really uncomfortable, start by appreciating something small. I really appreciate the spiritual atmosphere at the yoga center. I got to participate in daily spiritual practices, which, on the physical plane, overcame my hypothyroidism…..so many people are struggling with this disease and now I am healed. Lucky me.

Well, I am doing something right by changing my location in order to experiment with new healing techniques. I have incredible techniques now to achieve any goal that I want to. I am so grateful to have learned all this and it has helped me so much already. I love the contrast I am feeling right now that I am labeling “living place chaos”. I get to breath it in, love it, and be compelled to change my old, worn out thought patterns surrounding it for ultimate healing. I am sure harmony is around the corner. I can stand in the fire and truly welcome it. I am just burning up the gap.”

I go out for my normal evening run and stop at the doggie park. I walk in and carry on a friendly easy conversation with just about everyone in the park.  I am having fun and the contrast has simply melted. I feel much better and celebrate meeting someone new. Everyone at the park is extremely social.  We have a nice evening chatting with amongst ourselves just as though we had were on a pre arranged Saturday picnic.

Deborah can be reached for coaching at deborah@deborahbird.com

Law of Attraction

This blog shows:
1) The steps to deliberately creating a joyful experience.
2) How two people living side by side can experience a completely different reality even though they experience the same outward situation.
3) Defines and gives an example of pre-paving: a set of thoughts, words and emotions that focuses on any event past, present or future. Pre-paving creates a future that matches what was discussed, felt, and pondered. Most humans pre-pave unconsciously, usually by rehashing a negative experience, therefore resulting in more of the same. By harnessing our thoughts and purposely thinking and talking about good experiences, we will have good experiences.

As I drive to the lake, I begin pre-paving the experience I will have this weekend, which even surprises me in its effectiveness. I am going to a kayak outing with a large group of people and don’t know anyone. I have two friends coming this weekend, but whether we will camp together or spend time together is uncertain as they are not coming for the group experience and have a desire to camp more remotely.

Knowing that I am going to dive into a group of new people, I begin to pre-pave having a wonderful weekend. I picture myself having effortless, close and connected relations with the strangers I am about to meet. As someone who can be found pacing my apartment floor at 3 am from time to time, I also picture myself sleeping soundly and feeling well rested.

When arriving at the lake, I pull up to the gathering, situated around the perimeter of the lake. It’s a huge lake with numerous bays and the event is allotted one of the nicest. Even though its early evening on Friday, many people have already arrived and set up camp, which is in an open camping situation. I pull up next to an RV, get out, say hello and am immediately invited to sit down. I chat for a while, wander around, and meet a group who has come to the event together, who also invite me into their circle. I am in a happy flow.

When my friends arrive, we decide to camp separate from the group, slightly down the road. The spot has a high view of two bays, privacy and a campfire. We have an enjoyable evening sitting around the campfire, but my friends tell a few stories about previous camping outings where they asked noisy neighbors to be quieter and the neighbors became hostel. I cringe a bit and have to force myself not to lecture on the law of attraction and how they might be pre-paving, or creating, a noisy night.

I go to bed in my car and before falling asleep I look at all the beautiful stars beyond the car’s window and give gratitude. I wake up about ten times throughout the night and use a particular excersize to fall back asleep and It works well.

At one point, however, I have to crawl out of the car to go to the bathroom. I cannot believe what I hear when I open the car door - a cacophony of thumping music and people talking loudly. This campsite producing the unwanted concert is only 200 feet from where I am. With my car window open and housed in a small thin walled sedan, I heard nothing all night. As I reenter my car, I am anxious to see if it will block the sound and I am amazed that it does. At this point, I am wide awake, highly energized, but still fall back asleep.

Its only when I rise in the morning that I realize my consciously pre-paved reality is significantly different than my friends, whose tent was twenty feet further away from the disturbance than mine. The neighbor’s party kept them awake until 3am. These events inspired one of them to speak to the neighbors, a conversation that not did not go well….something about death threats I believe. As if this weren’t enough…… in yet another campsite a young woman was crying and vomiting for at least an hour. All the while, this normally finicky sleeper slept throughout the night and even until 7:30 am.

This is a great example of the Law of Attraction at work. Both my friends and I pre-paved our contrasting experiences ….me knowingly, with purpose, and with a positive outcome…..them unknowingly and without purpose, resulting in an unpleasant outcome. The formula my friends used is what most humans use day-to-day, hour-to-hour, and what Abraham-Hicks calls “sloppy thinking”.

In this situation, we were exposed to the exact same set of external circumstance, providing a good example to show that circumstances are irrelevant. The biggest gain in this scenario is maintaining a positive, joyful mental attitude throughout the day and into the following days. From this mindset, I will attract more joyful experiences into my life and my circumstances will improve on their own.

Don’t believe anything I say….try it and see what happens.

Debi is available for coaching sessions at debi@debibird.com or you may sign up at the Buy Now Button on this blog.